Friday 20 June 2014

Adagiri Adams 1








ADAM- /a:dam/- noun -> the strong macho body of a homo sapien male


The more I think about the weekend ahead of me,the more I realise I'm embarking on a 48-hour exercise in how to be a human pinball-- so to speak. I'm travelling to the gold coast-ghana along with my brothers to a location few kilometers before accra called The Last Resort- a place so precariously and exquisitely balanced amidst plunging faces of rock,soaring cliffs and gut-wrenching ravines that one can only reach it via a 1.6m-wide suspension bridge across a 160m-deep ravine with a raging river in its depth


The resort contains a rope swing and the chance to raft some pretty great rapids but the highlight of the trip promises to be the canyoning, which involves climbing,abseiling,sliding and swimming through a series of waterfalls and gorges.

For hours on end,I've been juggling waves of anticipation and mild fear- wait wah! mild?,hell no,great fear about our itinerary that will comprise an array of aeriel activities which on the difficulty-intimidation scale,fall only short of being fired out of a cannon or parachuting into one's destination


In truth,the whole weekend involves virtually no solid ground- even the ostensibly tranquil pre-tea saturday afternoon hours will find me perched on the back of an elephant

I know I should be excited about all this adventures but honestly,am not,infact how the hell did I get to going to ghana with my siblings in the first place?


24 HOURS EARLIER

4:30AM

I was deeply asleep,cuddled under my duvet and in dreamland far far away when-

Gbom! Gbom! Gbom!

"WAKE UP sleepy sleepy"

Hamz barked!

Hitting me with a feather-stuffed pillow,I turned around,upset about my sleep being disturbed,my face contorted with angry lines,I knew he'd come to wake me up for the usual morning exercise but I was really enjoying my sleep,I wrapped myself well with the duvet,positioned myself in a comfortable style and with a wave of the hand, "shooshed" him away


GBOM! GBOM! GBOM!

Hamz hit me harder

"WAAKE UP MAAAJ!"

He barked again,sounding almost like a reproach,pulling my duvet off me,I turned angrily,blocking my eyes from the beam of light that flooded the room

*ARE YOU MAD?!"

I bellowed

My morning breath hitting us both

"Ugh!"

Hamz retreated quickly,covering his nose,the action angered me the more,my eyes gradually getting accostumed to the light,I took my hand off my eyes

"WHAT THE F**K IS WRONG WITH YOU?!"

I charged

"IS IT BY FORCE TO GO FOR MORNING EXERCISE?"

I ranted,making sure my voice doesn't wake up mom in her room,I continued

"I wish I had sisters,not brothers,I sure would be pampered"

"Please cover your mouth abeg,I warned you about eating much onions last night while we ate suya,your breath stinks like death"

Hamz retorted,walking away from me to pick up his trainers

The door to the bathroom flung open and out came Karl, stark naked,his mulatto complexion,pale from taking his bath with very cold water,his hard muscular body dripping with water on the foot mat right before the bathroom door and as he patted his well sculpted apollo torso and his wet hair with his towel,his reddish-pink manhood dangled vigorously between his thighs

"Oh gosh,what am I waking up to this early morning"

I moaned,covering my eyes

"Must we endure this drama of yours on a daily basis? Maj! You have guys as siblings,we would naturally rub off on you,you should be used to waking up early by now, up you go and brush your teeth mr smello morning breath"

Karl and hamz laughed at his joke


I sighed,threw the duvet aside which was barely covering my feet now,stood up,stretched my body and yawned,my early morning hard on pushing forth the fly of my light PJ trousers,Karl made to hit my hard Johnny but I quickly retreated,pulling back my ass,we both laughed,my morning breath hitting Karl as well

"Ewoo! Biko maj,biko,na beg I dey beg"

Karl exclaimed in pidgin which took me and Hamz totally by surprise,we looked at each other and back to Karl,eyes gone saucers,we bursted in fits of laughter,we couldn't believe our ears


"Ah Kaaarli,Kaaarli,so you don dey put ear for the pigin wey we dey speak small small so?"

We all laughed,but Hamz wasn't particularly jolly

" Am stil working on the basics"

Karl responded,still smiling and putting on his tiny briefs tucking in his manhood. I picked up my brush and went to the bathroom to wash up,QT opened the door to the room,standing by the doorway,holding the door ajar

"Are you guys set?"

He asked.

4:45AM

"ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! PUMP GUYS! PUMP!"

QT barked, sweats dripping,muscles flexing,my brothers pumped hard,my veins straining,the morning exercise started in full swing starting with some squats,suddenly!

"CHAI"

I winced! Stopping my squats and falling with a thud on my buttocks,sitting on the ground and stretching my legs

"What this time?"

Hamz grumbled,stamping his feet,everyone stopped,my brothers sweat-soaked and breathing heavily

"I can't do this...I just can't "

Reeling with sporadic pangs of pain all through my thighs down,managing to get up on my feet,dusting sand off my buttocks,limping slightly

"Please free this bitch guys! He's just messing with my flow"

Hamz said scornfully

"WHAT?"

I snapped,making a move to hit him,QT quickly grabbed me by my waist,Hamz turned to face me,with a mischievous smirk,pointing to his pulsating abs and biceps

"STOP IT NOW HAMZ!"

Karl chided

"Oh leave him!"

Clenching my fists

"Let me slap the smirk off his ugly face"

As I made to slap him,QT pulled me back

"So you got muscles huh?! You think I can no longer discipline you? You spoilt brat"

I ranted

"Common Maj, chill"

QT tried to calm me down

I jerked myself off his grip,my body gliding away from his sweaty,hard and muscular body,I bent down to pick my face towel and left them at the rocky corner off our street where we usually train,walking off angrily towards home,QT and Karl kept calling me back,their voices echoing in the silence of the pre-dawn ambience of the training ground,I didn't budge,I kept on walking

Getting to the curve on the road that ushers me into my street,I heard rumblings in the nearby scanty,low-height bush along the pathway,the first signs of daylight just appearing in the horizon,totally alone,I ran fast to the house,knocked the gate frantically,Garuba opened the gate and I dashed in.


6:00AM

The door kicked open,engaged in a banter,my brothers,all looking dirty and sweaty walked in,they finished off early today,obviously my face off with Hamz was partly to blame and from their conversation,he was irritable after I left,almost leading to another face off between him and QT,so Karl suggested they leave early.

I was on the praying mat,saying my subh prayer when they came in,mom prayed in her room,they went upstairs and seconds later,sounds of the shower turned on and splash of water against the bathroom tiled walls could be heard,it was early morning and everywhere silent,you could pretty much hear someone breath

7:30AM

The breakfast of bread and tea with sardine was all set,hot water in the flask,beverages,tea cups,all set,my family came downstairs to gather around the
dining table to eat,we greeted mom and started on our meal

"I love your new cologne mom"

I complimented,mom took a look at me,chewing her food and waiting to swallow before responding


"If that's your way of saying we would both start using it,you are a liar,I must'nt see you in my room,thanks though"

She retorted,everyone laughed

"Haba na mummy,don't be like that,I love to smell like you"

I whined

"Go buy yours"

She replied,waving me off,sipping her tea hurriedly,like she just remembered something important to say

"Your cousin Hameed called me few minutes ago"

Mom announced,taking more sips,we were all elated and attentive,uncle Hameed as we call him is our well grown cousin,married with kids, living in ghana and quite rich,he got me my laptop and when it got stolen,got me another

"Hope he is well?"

I said

"Oh yes he is...he told me he has some business to do in nigeria today,so he would be flying in,in and out anyway,because as soon as he's through,he would take the next flight back,but he would branch by to say hello to us,that means I would have to leave work early today,would take permission from my boss"

My mom said,standing up,straightening her suit,ready for work

"YAY!"

I was happy...we were all happy and this would be his first time of meeting Karl

"....and boys..."

Mom called out,picking her bag,ready to move

"I want this house sparkling by the time I return,ok?"

"Aye! Momma"

"Yes ma'am"

"Sure ma"

We chorused, mom waved goodbye and left

THE STORY IS JUST ABOUT TO BEGIN


KEEP UP

28 comments:

  1. *fasten seat belt*

    Oya na yaga yaga,looooove kuwda

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hmmn,this promises to be interesting,maj-style,first part the appetizer,the next just drops ur jaw,what happened in ghana? Keeping fingers crossed
    Imelda

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  3. Hamz and maj are the closest of the siblings,why the sudden revolt,in my opinion it satirises society in a way,when one doesn't have power,they are mellow,when they get power,u see their real behaviour
    Says gbenga from ph

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree with u but hamz has always had muscles,he's just falling back to his old,rude ways methinks

      Delete
    2. The way maj describes the anatomy of a human being kind of makes one horny,both men and women and adagiri adams, very suitable to the story,obviously on going on this very masculine adventure to ghana,weldone maj

      Delete
  4. Small small maj,the grammer pass me small abeg

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The grammer pass u? ehen! It's a way for you to build up on your spoken and written english,so you know what I suggest? Pick your dictionary and check up words you don't understand

      Delete
    2. How dare you talk to me in that manner?I understand the grammer very well,I just said that to be funny
      Oniranu oshi,hiding behind anonymous

      Delete
    3. *checking through my previous response to your comment* hello mr charcoal calling kettle black,you are also anon hello? And you said you only said that to be funny? I laugh,its ok,I understand what you are trying to do,pele dear
      And my name is biodun,or beaourdune u want my twirrer handle? *tongue out*

      Delete
  5. Hahahaha! Good of karl grasping pidgin bit by bit and shocking you guys with it,also,is QT such a quiet guy?he barely talks and why don't we hear much on mom?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Maaaaajjiii,you be gay? Moaning when you saw your naked half-brother,ahhhh,incest gay,I've alwaysbeen suspecting you the way you mention and emphasize on his "muscular" body all the time,we know your brothers are hard and muscular,and always hugging him,being in his arms,holding his built biceps,hmmmmn,majjjiiiii,I dey call you ooo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are really dumb,haba,maj and his bro shagging?if you don't know,maj is such a ladies man,he's as straight as it gets,have you read episodes from facebook?take several back seats abeg

      Delete
  7. He he he heeee,the way y'all clinching on maj ehn,as though y'all know him on a first-name basis,y'all just fans,pls leave my maj alone
    Genny girlie o

    ReplyDelete
  8. Ah! Lol,maj going canyoning,walking on rope bridges and all,ah! Maj maj! Lol,you better just sit at home oo,abeg,don't follow your soldier looking brothers on such an adventure

    ReplyDelete
  9. Ah! Lol,maj going canyoning,walking on rope bridges and all,ah! Maj maj! Lol,you better just sit at home oo,abeg,don't follow your soldier looking brothers on such an adventure

    ReplyDelete
  10. Amazing piece,am hooked on kuwda

    ReplyDelete
  11. Would you refer mto maj as an adagiri adam?given ur definition,maj isn't ,title doesn't apply well

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Chai,kuwda isn't meant for everyone,abeg take you ignorance outta here before you infect everyone

      Delete
  12. I love this piece...bated breaths till the next episode

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  13. Maj,u need to slap hamz and teach him a lesson,what rude thing,haba,so we've seen all the brothers,when would we see mom?

    ReplyDelete
  14. Lol,I love the whole encounter in the room

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  15. Kuwdominion! Go guys!

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  16. Can't wait for adagiri adams 2

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  17. Maj,how did u get to be such a good writer,stringing events on like a pro
    Good work darling
    Rebecca

    ReplyDelete
  18. Let me guess,u fell down when u got to ghana while...what's the word,abseiling,yes...and canyoning and sliding hrough gorges and your brothers making fun of u abi?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Why are people like this?ehn! Those are actual words,check ur your dic,haba,reading throygh from the beginning,could you predict how it would have ended? Onyiara,abeg maj dey write dey go joh

      Delete
    2. Maj,get used to people like this and their negativity,just focus on the job,ur true amazeballs are solidly behind u

      Delete
  19. So amazing and interesting piece #ILoveKuwda muah

    ReplyDelete